|Article Overview: Many
people think they are different from others. They end up digging
Caves of Intimidation, alienating themselves from others.
They become fuel for the Beast of Terror's fires. But,
they can escape. Find out how.
Saturday, April 3,
2004—Ground Zero Plus 934
The Terror Of "Being Different!"
GROUND ZER0, New York, N.Y.--April 3, 2004 -- Many people think
they are "different from" everyone else.
This feeling drives them into a cave,
huddled, arms hugging their knees, eyes flicking about in the dark,
ears cocked for any sound that might signal an intruder seeking to
expose their "difference" to the world.
The disease of
"inferiority" makes people feel "different"
This disease is called "inferiority."
It is a sense of being "less than" others, separated from the herd,
"different" in a negative sense.
Some people feel this way because
they think they are too fat or too skinny, too tall or too short, too
uneducated or too unworthy, too poor or too unskilled.
These divisions between "being like"
and "being different" exist within the mind, often fed by comments or
actions by people who tend to look "down" on others and presume their
humanity is above others. These are those people who think
they are a hammer and others are nails. They are Personality
Terrorists, who like to drive wedges between themselves and others,
and dance alone with an elite few upon the head of the nail.
They are as inaccurate in their
judgment of themselves as they are in those they scoff at or
disenfranchise for being of a "lower order." They live in their
own caves, however well heated and fur-lined such caves might be.
Not wanting to
get hurt, children (and adults) live in Caves of Intimidation
But the majority
live in the Cave of Intimidation. They shrink from
associations with others on the grounds they are "not worthy" or that
others will "harm them" and, like the dog that has been beaten once
too often by his master, runs to the cave and hides in the darkness so
as not to risk the danger of another beating, no matter how friendly
the new person holding out the bone seems to appear. The dog is
sure that beneath the skin of the "friend" beats the heart of the
Beast of Terror, a Violator of Trust, a Heart Crusher who will reach
into the chest and rip out the dog's heart and gnaw on it in front of
That makes the cave so much more
excitingly safe. It makes the cold, damp, dankness
of the bowels of the earth appear like a hearth of safety instead of
its true nature--a dungeon of the soul.
I know a little bit about the
Cave Of Intimidation. I have lived in one for most
of my life, occasionally sticking out my head to try and live in the
sunshine and commingle with the creatures of Light and Sunshine,
hoping they would not hurt me, punish me and banish me back to the
I have been unsuccessful in
such a quest.
This, I am finding out, is not
because the world turned against me when I was a child, but because I
believed the world turned against me as a child. There is
a difference and that difference is about as thick as the leading edge
of finely honed razor.
Being Different" is a quiet Terror
This "Terror Of Being
Different" is a quiet Terror. It often surrounds itself with
boisterous personality, a kind of shield attempting to mask the
reality within that the person making all the noise and shouting and
gesticulating is actually trying to ward off anyone attempting to get
close. The power of such a personality is like a reverse
magnet repelling rather attracting those seeking to penetrate the
That's pretty much how I've done it.
I've made a lot of "white noise" in
an attempt to cover my Cave of Intimidation and camouflage it so that
no one, often even myself, knows it is my retreat, my haven, my
personality coffin where I can be in state of stasis, avoiding facing
the world's challenges of "being part of," and "integrating within"
the "normal flow" of humanity.
Those of us who "feel different
from," who deep down believe that aliens deposited them here on earth
to try and integrate with humanoids, find it virtually impossible to
hold another's hand in a link of human equality on the grounds that we
are all equal, all given the same opportunity, all able to climb the
same ladders regardless of race, color, creed or born rank.
Cave Creatures such as myself and
others know that of the six billion people on this earth, we are
different. No matter how hard we try, we can never
"be like" others. We can't be like the rich or the poor.
And, for sure we can't be in the middle. We can't be like the
smart or the dumb, the fat or thin, the ugly or the beautiful.
We can't fit in the middle or the ends of humanity, and however we try
to wriggle ourselves into different roles and play different parts, in
the end we are stripped naked. In the end we stand humiliated
before the Mirror of Truth that we are "Nothings," and "Nobodies".
And we run wildly through the twisted underbrush to find our caves and
scramble wildly down the narrow passages until we sit with our backs
against the cold jagged rocks we carved with our bare hands from the
womb of the earth and clutch ourselves and wait for the sounds of the
Beast's footsteps to track us down.
I would have never thought I
was a Cave of Intimidation Dweller. Over the past few
weeks I have been undergoing intense therapy for Post Traumatic Stress
Disorder at the VA hospital in Manhattan.
The horror I witnessed at
Ground Zero on Nine Eleven mixed new pain with old pain, conspiring to
drive me further into the Cave of Intimidation where for years I have
retreated, unbeknownst even to myself.
I hid under
the covers seeking security in darkness
That part of me that didn't
want to face the Truth ran, like the wounded child, to hide under the
covers in hopes there was some safety, some security in the darkness.
Abused children seek such hiding
places. They will often hide in closets, under beds, under
porches, as any frightened animal might, hoping that the walls around
them will serve to thwart the imposing threat.
Some of us create, as we grow
older, Caves of Intimidation in the mind so that when we face the
horror of confrontation, when someone violates our Trust, or when we
feel violated, we can run, hide, dwell within ourselves in hopes of
I was told the other day that I
must come out of the Cave of Intimidation.
I can no longer hide inside it.
I must face reality, I was
I must not be afraid of my own
I understood what was being
said, but I have trouble accepting it. I am a
warrior, a brave and strong man. I have fought many
battles. How could I be a frightened child rushing to a
Cave of Intimidation?
leave my cave to
create a new world of Vigilance
But as the therapist
went on, I began to realize he was right. I actually saw my
Cave. I saw my isolation. I saw myself shoving everyone
away and huddling in the darkness, fearful of being hurt by them,
never wanting to open up for fear the Beast of Disillusion would crush
what little strands of faith I had left in myself and others.
I was told to take the risk.
To create a new world.
To become Vigilant and
manufacture the Courage, Conviction and Right Actions to escape the
Cave of Intimidation.
I think I must.
I believe I have no choice.
If you even think you live in
such a place, or, that you may be digging yourself such a cave, STOP.
Take the Pledge of Vigilance.
There is a world beyond that
Terrorism creates worth living in. We just need to learn
to build Villages of Vigilance instead of Caves of Intimidation to
I'm willing to try. Are
Stalked By Beast Of Binding-Torture-Killing Terror